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Saturday, February 11, 2012

What's in a year


Valentines Day is the one year anniversary of my remission. This calls for a very good bottle of champagne. My numbers are still good (CA 125 under 6) and there are days at a time when I actually forget that I have cancer. (FYI cancer is always a present tense phenomenon). My reminder is the half day I spend at MaGee Women's Hospital once a month for my Avastin treatments which I will do forever. I expect this forever to be a very long time.

There is no greater perspective building exercise than spending time every month in a chemo room. Every time, without exception there is a poignant exchange, usually with strangers, who all share a common enemy. It's amazing actually. Last time I sat next to a woman who was having a CT scan to determine if she was in remission; she had been in and out of remission several times. We held hands in the waiting room and talked about the possibilities. Comfort words must be selective- you can never say "it will be OK" or "I'm sure you'll be fine" because those well meaning comments are not realistic to cancer survivors. Instead you say "I will hope and pray for good outcomes" or " I pray that you have the strength to deal with whatever news you get". Thank you all for knowing just what to say in your posts and in your cards, and calls and visits. I can only hope you know how vital you were to my journey and my recovery.

I am busy helping two amazing teenagers navigate through middle school and high school. Zoe will be going to Sam's school for high school this fall. They are both excited to be at the Science and Technology Academy together. Zoe is a math and science girl so this seems to be a good fit for her. She loves computers and has expressed an interest in the computers and connection concentration. Zoe is taking an African dance class at Dance Alloy and loving it. She is an expert computer gamer and her current favorite is kingdom hearts. She speaks of it in a language I don't understand. She works with the friendship circle as a volunteer and as a special friend and Sam volunteers as well which enhances their lives and the kids in the circle.

Sam will get his driving license imminently and his words to you are "if you don't like my driving, stay off the sidewalks". I believe his grandfather is responsible for this wisdom. Pap pap we miss you and can't believe it is two years since you've been gone. You remain in our hearts and I still reach for the phone often to call you to share the day's joys and sorrows.

I am teaching negotiations for the Heinz College at CMU and enjoying it tremendously. My students are wicked smart and diverse in so many ways- age, profession, nationality, gender, it's all you could ask for a negotiations class when diverse perspectives are often the key to success. I am working hard to raise $250K to launch my negotiation academy at CMU. Meeting with corporate, foundation and individual donors to meet this goal. All ideas welcome. I remain convinced that this is the intervention that will truly make a difference for women at all ages and stages. I am also coaching the mock trial team at Sam's high school and we won our first round of competitions. We are very proud and the young counselors and witnesses have achieved a proficiency that they didn't think was possible. It is a satisfying endeavor for all involved.

Jonathan continues to be a force of creativity and persistence. He is designing a pilot for pharmaceutical companies to move our successful webcast model to other industries. It would seem the right fit for all his talents and a good timing to appeal to Pharma. Jonathan's work is truly spectacular. He does Bikram yoga many times a week which keeps his back and attitude nicely adjusted.

Brother Tim lives a couple of blocks away which couldn't be better (well maybe next door). We love his special friend Laurie and her son Peter and enjoy all the time we have together. We will all be in Florida at the end of March with brother Joe and family to watch niece Catherine play softball. Joe and I now in Florida to help out the octogenarian aunties who we love so much. Aunt Dot (age 89) is very compromised cognitively and Aunt Margaret is beyond heroic in taking care of her. These women have known each other for over 70 years! We helped Margaret (age 87) get an ipad yesterday in an attempt to catapult her into the 20th century. Today is the tutorial; it should be interesting. She still can't believe that you can get a newspaper electronically.

Well here's a pause to celebrate life, friends, family and making sure that in our time here we make a difference.